Archive for February, 2005

Much-Anticipated E-mail

February 28, 2005

Note from my NY/NJ “boss” to the project team:

“Office hours are at your discretion.”

Basically, try and be here before 9am, and stick around until at least 4 or so, OK?

Oh, finally.

Snowing here, too.


Legos Do Escher

February 28, 2005


via Alas

Trolling Through Blogs for Useless Trivia

February 27, 2005

It’s Sunday. Looking for useless trivia that doesn’t piss me off. Not finding much.

I think I’m going to go out and buy books today.


February 27, 2005

This weekend has been reserved for much-needed decompression time. The problem with go-go-go nonstop is that I need down time in order to properly evaluate everything that’s going on: to look at what’s going on, re-evaluate what I want, and figure my shit out.

One of Jenn’s buddies from California is over for the night, and I opened up the door to find a tall, blue-eyed guy in a suit staring back at me, and felt a startled jolt at the idea that ah, yes, this was the guy I’d been hearing about for the last five years, standing at my doorway… and I looked at him, and he looked at me, and sweet fuck, he’s pretty. And damn, yes, he’s currently single.

We all went out for dinner, and the plan after that was to go to the Hancock Tower for drinks and then go out to the Second City comedy club and have a night of it… but after dinner, when we came back to the place so Jenn could switch coats, I realized I really didn’t want to go out on the town. I just wanted to be home. I leave for New Jersey again on Monday. All I want is this time, here, in my own bed, sleeping and mulling over everything that’s going on. I haven’t had enough downtime.

So I bowed out of the rest, and here I am, preparing for bed, trying to work some stuff out, wondering about life, about what I want, about how everything can fit together, wondering about… just, everything, and how it can all go spectacularly wrong and change you forever, for better or worse.

I wonder, sometimes, if relationships are just sort of like the rest of the things in my life… something I’m so afraid of, but need to come to grips with in order to live fully.

I’ve been told that vertigo is not, in fact, the fear of falling – it’s your mind fighting your body’s desire to fall. We have a tendancy to desire those jumps, those freefalls into space, and what we fight, the battle we wage, is desire against logic.

For some bridges, the big kind, the ones you jump off in order to die, these are good battles to fight: having some wit keeps you breathing. But for those more modest bridges, the ones, say 55 ft. tall with a freefall into water, well, those are more realistic bridges; the ones our mind might fear, but the sort of jump that will make us different, better, for having jumped it.

That’s what I’m decompressing.

Good, Old Fashioned Romance

February 26, 2005

Everybody needs a little lovin’…

via Greg.

Ah, Chicago

February 26, 2005

Oh, I’m home….

Thai food, beer, soaking in the tub, decadent reading of multiple books…

Oh, yes. This is the good life.

You’re In Trouble

February 25, 2005

Mosh just took me aside with the immortal words, “You’re in trouble,” and put me in a closed-door meeting with him.

Thoughts running through my head:

1) Somebody’s been checking my internet time. I’m screwed.

2) Somebody found my blog

3) Somebody found out that I’m staying at the Grand Hyatt week after next

4) Hopefully, I’ll be fired.

In fact, Mosh was totally being a smartass, and he’d brought me in to discuss my $1000 yearly bonus that just got deposited into my account. 40% is stock, 60% is cash, but all of the taxes come out of the cash, so I’ve only got an extra $221 in my account.

Not exactly a high-roller.

I was thanked for doing what I do (what do I do, exactly?) and thanked for my willingnes to travel, and told what an asset I was and blah blah and hope you’ll be here many years to come and blah.

I swear, people can totally sense when you’re completely fed up with your job and ready to jump ship.

The Pope

February 25, 2005

Gosh, sure is lucky he had the choice to have an elective surgery, huh? Sure is great that the Catholic church thinks going to the hospital for an elective surgery is OK, if it can potentially improve and lengthen your quality of life.

How thoughtful of them, to let him choose how he’d like to be cared for. I mean, could you imagine having the procedure in place that could potentially allow him to lead a better life, but him being unable to make that choice because his religion said that only God could play God and that humans had no right to interfere with the body’s “natural” processes? Like, say, birth and death?

He sure is lucky to be a white man with choices. White men sure are lucky that way.

So Incredibly Illegal

February 25, 2005

This is just sooo incredibly illegal that I didn’t even think it was worthy of bringing up: it’s just so illegal. You just can’t do it.

But that was when I lived in another country.

Why aren’t they demanding the sexual health and histories of the men whose sperm instigated these pregnancies? Aren’t promiscuous men equally suspect of being “sexual perverts” because they fucked around?

Oh, wait, I forgot: women are the sexual gatekeepers. Guys get a Get Out of Jail Free card.

This is fucking grotesque. It’s a mockery of women, of the supposed “equality” of women, and it’s a fucking smack in the face for every fucking woman who’s fought to keep her body off the state chattle market.

Bull fucking shit. Bullshit. This isn’t treating women like human beings. Watch yourself being put back into line, chiklits, one Kansas attorney general at a time.

I want a record of his sexual history, seeing as everybody’s sexual history is now of the utmost importance to the State.

Fuck you, asshole.

Random Links

February 25, 2005

Alaskans make me proudCheck out the latest shuttle commander… Here’s what happens when your parents get pissed off with what you write

D.H. Lawrence gets taken to the mat:

It is hard to take Lawrence’s preachings about ‘phallic tenderness’ seriously, other than as a reflection of the deep-rooted fears evoked by the first phase of the sexual and economic emancipation of women. He is the ultimate spokesman for a particular type of male personality, so defended against a devouring mother that he is crippled by fear of commitment.

And, Look! The Gays Are Taking Over the Phillipines, too! In the army, no less! All this gayness! All this marriage! Too much love and happiness and this world might just EXPLODE!

And, for your workday amusement… Practical Applications of the Philosopher’s Stone. For Drunks.

All via Jenn. Cause lord knows I haven’t had the time to find all of these myself…